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70 Halloween Quotes To Celebrate The Spirit Of The Spooky Season

"By the pricking of my thumbs, Something wicked this way comes."

If Shakespeare's classic "Macbeth" quote sends a shiver down your spine, it should — it's creepy, chilling and even a bit scary, which is exactly what you want from a Halloween quote.

After all, the holiday is dedicated to darkness and celebrates all kinds of ghoulish delights, like horror movies, monsters and terrifying experiences. All of which can be perfectly paired with one of these spooky Halloween quotes.

In honor of All Hallow's Eve, we've, ahem, unearthed these short, funny and mildly unsettling Halloween quotes to use however you see fit.

Post one as a caption to accompany your Halloween activities on Instagram or recite a few as you and your boo crew carve this year's jack-o'-lantern.

In the collection below, you'll find memorable sayings from luminaries like Edgar Allan Poe and Ray Bradbury. We've also got quotes from your favorite Halloween movies including "The Nightmare Before Christmas," "Hocus Pocus," "Beetlejuice," "The Addams Family" and many more.

Who knows when having a spooky saying will come in handy, but if and when you do, these Halloween quotes will leave you completely spellbound.

Short Halloween quotes

"A lantern in his hand he bears, the way by night to show; and, from its flame, he's got the name of Jack O'Lantern now." — Hercules Ellis, "The Romance of Jack O'Lantern"

"But come forth on Halloween. 'All the spirits, good and evil, fay and pixie, witch and wizard, on this night will sure be stirring.'" — Arthur Peterson, "Halloween"

"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream." — Edgar Allan Poe, "A Dream Within a Dream"

"And skeletons dancing to a tune; and cries of children stifled soon; and over all a blood-red moon." — Conrad Aiken, "The Vampire"

"Evil has only the power that we give it." — Ray Bradbury, "Something Wicked This Way Comes"

"Every day is Halloween, isn't it? For some of us." — Tim Burton

"Halloween spooks outside my window, Halloween spooks behind the tree. I wish that the children could see, but I can't find them for the life of me. And there's Halloween spooks outside my window pane!" — Lambert, Hendricks & Ross, "Halloween Spooks"

"Flip the switch and let the cauldron bubble!" — Aunt Frances Owens, "Practical Magic"

 "By the pricking of my thumbs, Something wicked this way comes." — William Shakespeare, "Macbeth"

"They cannot be seen because they creep only in the dark." — H.P. Lovecraft, "The H.P. Lovecraft Collection"

"On Hallowe'en they all jump off the roof and fly!" — Ice Cream Boy, "Practical Magic"

"In masks and gowns we haunt the street and knock on doors for trick or treat." — Jack Prelutsky, "It's Halloween"

"Searchers after horror haunt strange, far places." — H.P. Lovecraft, "The Short Stories of H.P. Lovecraft"  

"I knew nothing but shadows and I thought them to be real." -Oscar Wilde, "The Picture of Dorian Gray"

"Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn, and caldron bubble." — William Shakespeare, "Macbeth"

"There is something haunting in the light of the moon." — Joseph Conrad

"At night the fog was thick and full of light, and sometimes voices." — Erin Bow, "Plain Kate"

"Life itself is but the shadow of death, and souls departed but the shadows of the living." — Thomas Browne, "Garden of Cyrus"

Halloween quotes from movies

"I am the pumpkin king." — Jack Skellington, "The Nightmare Before Christmas"

"Last night you were unhinged. You were like some desperate, howling demon. You frightened me. Do it again." — Morticia, "The Addams Family"

"This is my costume. I'm a homicidal maniac, they look just like everyone else." — Wednesday Addams, "The Addams Family"

"You ever feel prickly things on the back of your neck?"— Cole Sear, "The Sixth Sense"

"There's a little witch in all of us." — Alice Hoffman, "Practical Magic"

"When I sleep my spirit slips away from my body and dances naked with the devil." — Thomasin, "The Witch"

"It's Halloween. Everyone's entitled to one good scare." — Sheriff Leigh Brackett, "Halloween"

What's the good of being a ghost if you can't frighten people away?" — Barbara, "Beetlejuice"

"One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach; all the damn vampires." — Grandpa, "The Lost Boys"

"Sisters, All Hallows' Eve has become a night of frolic, where children wear costumes and run amok!" — Winifred Sanderson, "Hocus Pocus"

"Yeah, some of our clothes are from victims. You might bite someone and then, you think, 'Oooh, those are some nice pants!' — Viago, "What We Do in the Shadows"

"It's pronounced 'Fronkensteen.'" — Dr. Frederick Frankenstein, "Young Frankenstein"

"Wench! Trollop! You buck-toothed, mop-riding firefly from hell!" — Billy Butcherson, "Hocus Pocus"

"If you were the only suspect in a senseless bloodbath — would you be standing in the horror section?" — Randy Meeks, "Scream"

"I'll stop wearing black when they make a darker color." —Wednesday Addams, "The Addams family"

"Oh, look. Another glorious morning. Makes me sick!" — Winifred Sanderson, "Hocus Pocus"

"Some people have swimming pools, others have private cemeteries. It can happen." — Sara Evers, "The Haunted Mansion"

"If I'd known you were coming, I could've made up the dungeon." — Morticia Addams, "The Addams Family"

Funny Halloween quotes

"Isn't the view beautiful? It takes my breath away. Well, it would if I had any." — The Corpse Bride, "The Corpse Bride"

"Pardon me, boy, is this the Transylvania station?" — Dr. Frederick Frankenstein, "Young Frankenstein"

"There are three things that I've learned never to discuss with people: religion, politics and the Great Pumpkin." — Linus, "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown"

"That's what you dream about? Being a monster?" — Edward Cullen, "Twilight"

"Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker." ― Ogden Nash, "Reflections on Ice Breaking"

 "Was deciding if I should dress as Batman or Spiderman for Halloween, when I realized I'm a grown man. So, Batman." — Stephen Colbert

"For Halloween, I'm going as that feeling you get at a store when you try to refold a sweater property and put it back on the shelf." — Rob Delaney

"Tonight the Great Pumpkin will rise out of the pumpkin patch. He flies through the air and brings toys to all the children of the world." — Linus, "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown"

"I ain't 'fraid of no ghost." — Ray Parker Jr., "Ghostbusters"

"On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me." — Rodney Dangerfield

"Halloween is just finals week for parents." — Jim Gaffigan

"Halloween: the night that fathers get their hearts broken when they see their daughters costume." — Whitney Cummings

Halloween quotes

"She'd always loved Halloween. A magic night. A night when anything could happen. Monsters could be real. Magic could whisper in the air." — Cynthia Eden

"Anyone could see that the wind was a special wind this night, and the darkness took on a special feel because it was All Hallows' Eve." — Ray Bradbury, "The Halloween Tree"

"It's Halloween! It's Halloween! The moon is full and bright and we shall see that can't be seen on any other night." — Jack Prelutsky, "It's Halloween"

"If I cannot inspire love, I will cause fear!" — Mary Shelley, "Frankenstein"

"Oh how the candles will be lit and the wood of worm burn in a fiery dust. For on all Hallows' Eve will the spirits come to play." — Solange nicole

"They thought of All Hallows' Night and the billion ghosts awandering the lonely lanes in cold winds and strange smokes." — Ray Bradbury, "The Halloween Tree"

"A witch never gets caught. Don't forget that she has magic in her fingers and devilry dancing in her blood." — Roald Dahl, "The Witches"

"I know of witches who whistle at different pitches, calling things that don't have names." — Helen Oyeyemi, "White is for Witching"

"We shall see that at which dogs howl in the dark, and that at which cats prick up their ears after midnight." — H.P. Lovecraft, "The Collected Works of H.P. Lovecraft"

"Tis now the very witching time of night, when churchyards yawn and hell itself breathes out contagion to this world." — William Shakespeare, "Hamlet"

"Shadows of a thousand years rise again unseen, voices whisper in the trees, 'Tonight is Halloween!'" — Dexter Kozen

"The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown." — H.P. Lovecraft, "Supernatural Horror in Literature"

"Suddenly the day was gone, night came out from under each tree and spread." — Ray Bradbury, "The Halloween Tree"

"Be careful in the company of monsters that you don't become one." — Cindy Gerard, "Take No Prisoners"

"Fear has many eyes, and can see things underground." — Miguel de Cervantes, "The Adventures of Don Quixote"

"Darkness falls across the land, the midnight hour is close at hand." — Vincent Price, "Thriller"

 "Whoever is not in his coffin and the dark grave, let him know he has enough." — Walt Whitman

"So the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing." — T.S. Eliot

 "I be the witch of the wood." — Thomasin, "The Witch"

"You are about to enter another dimension. A dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land of imagination. Next stop: The Twilight Zone." — Rod Serling, "The Twilight Zone"

"The jack-o'-lantern follows me with tapered, glowing eyes. His yellow teeth grin evily. His cackle I despise." — Richelle Goodrich, "Slaying Dragons"

"Candle, spoon and carving knife: nearing the vigil of the dead, let's impose a little life upon a ripening, faceless head." — Robert B. Shaw, "Jack O' Lantern"

The Harris-Biden Admin Thought It Could Censor COVID Satire On Facebook. Now That's Funny

It's official: The Harris-Biden administration is a joke. And none of us should be laughing.

On Monday, Facebook founder and Meta honcho Mark Zuckerberg revealed some unfunny truths in a letter to House Judiciary Committee Chairman Jim Jordan (R-Ohio).

"In 2021, senior officials from the Biden Administration, including the White House, repeatedly pressured our teams for months to censor certain Covid-19 content, including humor and satire, and expressed a lot of frustration with our teams when we didn't agree," wrote Zuckerberg, who, as of late, seems to be exhibiting signs of early-onset red-pilling.

Trying to suppress political satire is a dangerous knock at the First Amendment, and an insult to our American values. Kamala Harris owns this dystopian overreach.

This, however, isn't the first we've learned of this administration's plot to make America glum again with digital censorship. Joy, we hardly knew ye.

Meta honcho Mark Zuckerberg revealed that the Biden administration pushed to remove COVID-related information, including humor and satire, from Facebook in 2021. Bloomberg via Getty Images

In 2023, Jordan released information that Biden White House senior adviser Andy Slavitt, who left his job in June 2021, demanded Facebook remove a hyper-viral, vaccine-critical meme.

It was a shot of Leonardo DiCaprio from "Once Upon A Time in Hollywood" pointing at the television and, essentially, saying how in 10 years' time, we'll be seeing ambulance-chasing law firm commercials targeting vaccine recipients who may be entitled to compensation.

Kamala Harris and Joe Biden's administration tried to suppress information on Facebook during the pandemic. Ron Sachs – CNP for NY Post

Slavitt was outraged and reportedly said the post "was directly comparing Covid vaccines to asbestos poisoning in a way that demonstrably inhibits confidence amongst those the Biden administration is trying to reach."

We won two world wars and defeated communism, but a meme is too scary and potent.

This effort to disappear a topical joke displayed a low regard for Americans' intelligence — and the administration's own appetite for authoritarianism.

But to see it in black and white, in Zuckerberg's own words, is particularly jarring: The White House wanted to kill not just something it viewed as COVID disinformation (what a dumb term), but also humor that chipped away at the left's stranglehold on a narrative that subjugated us.

Or maybe just gave us a chuckle.

The offending meme that a White House official demanded Facebook take down.

A narrative that sowed fear, justified prolonged school closures, destroyed businesses and, in some cases, required people to take a vaccine just to keep their job.

It's criminally unfunny.

Humor and satire are necessary parts of a free and functioning society. They help us deal with our crappy lives and unspeakable tragedies. They unify and disarm. And, when deployed in a searing, effective way, they hold a mirror up to our society's absurdities, poking holes in our overlords' worst impulses.

It's been most necessary this last decade or so, especially as our culture has become an epic pile-up of lunacy. We masked little kids and were mandated to stand 6 feet apart, a figure that Anthony Fauci now admits was pulled out of his hiney.

Tall, strapping males like Lia Thomas called themselves girls and joined women's college swim and cycling competitions. We were supposed to revere trans athletes for their bravery, and threatened with ruin should we point out the obvious farce.

The letter that Mark Zuckerberg sent to the House Judiciary Committee about government pressure to censor information during the COVID-19 pandemic. @JudiciaryGOP/X

And wealthy white women like Robin DiAngelo — now an accused plagiarist — made boatloads of cash lecturing corporations about racial equity. In another era, all of these would be fresh ingredients for the best episodes of "Saturday Night Live" or "In Living Color."

But as the once-funny left developed sacred cows, people have been canceled for daring to say the obvious. Or blasted for exercising the smallest bit of critical thinking skills — even if was cloaked in yuks.

Just ask Jon Stewart, who applied logic on "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert" in 2021. In the now-infamous appearance, Stewart — the 2022 recipient of the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor (yes, we have one of those) — hilariously said it was obvious that the virus came from the Wuhan lab, adding: "The disease is the same name as the lab!"

Satire site the Babylon Bee was suspended by Twitter for calling trans woman Rachel Levine "Man of the Year." @TheBabylonBee/X

Or Woody Harrelson's gonzo "SNL" monologue in 2023, which took aim at the virus and vaccines. That led to a fierce tsk-tsk from the mainstream media, with many dismissing it as dangerous conspiracies.

And still, humor has been a lifeboat in a rising tide of woke-ism.

Efforts at suppression, mostly by our now-scoldy cultural institutions, have forged a thriving and edgy comedy scene — Andrew Schulz, Shane Gillis, Tim Dillon — as well as a handful of hard-charging podcasts, like Tony Hinchliffe's "Kill Tony" and Ryan Long's sketches that reliably ridicule our obsession with identity and politics.

And look at what happened in 2022, when Twitter suspended the account of the sharp satire site the Babylon Bee for the high crime of misgendering HHS second-in-command Dr. Rachel Levine, a biological man who transitioned in 2011.

Jon Stewart, who won the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, was the target of fiery backlash after saying on Colbert that it was obvious that COVID came from the Wuhan lab. Getty Images

As a rejoinder to USA Today naming Levine "Woman of the Year," the site awarded the doctor "Man of the Year." It set off a firestorm and meaningful discussion about free speech. And truth.

And it also helped push Elon Musk to buy Twitter, though not without many tears from the ultra-progressives who once ruled the platform with a castigating iron fist.

Eventually, the people will have the last laugh.

Travis Kelce Quotes "Office Space" And Employs His Signature Phrase In Hilarious Footage From Chiefs Camp

The video was shared on the NFL team's social media accounts

Scott Winters/Icon Sportswire via Getty

Travis Kelce during training camp on August 2, 2024

Travis Kelce knows how to have fun on and off the field!

On Wednesday, Aug. 21, the Kansas City Chiefs shared a hilarious compilation of the tight end's latest mic'd up moments from practice.

The video, shared on the NFL team's official TikTok and Instagram accounts, begins with a view of the athlete, 34, talking to himself as he stretches out his hamstrings.

"Ooo, hamstrings aren't too bad," he says before quickly having a change of heart: "Oh, don't speak too soon there, bud."

Related: Patrick Mahomes Jokes That He Did Behind-the-Back Pass to Travis Kelce 'Out of Spite' During 2nd Chiefs Preseason Game

Kelce is then seen running some plays and asks his teammates, "That didn't tire y'all out?" He then hilariously pulls one of his fellow NFL stars aside to ask, "You ever been on TV? Say hi to Mom."

As the video cuts to additional footage of Kelce on the field, the mic picks up his voice as he says his signature "Alright now" phrase and quotes the 1999 comedy Office Space when he asks, "Has anyone seen my stapler?"

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While Kelce likes to have fun, Chiefs quarterback Patrick Mahomesspoke out about his disciplined work ethic during a press conference earlier this month.

Chiefs/Tiktok

Travis Kelce during football practice

Related: When Will Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce See Each Other Again? Inside Their Schedules

"He loves working," Mahomes, 28, shared with reporters. "It makes my job easy as a leader to push other guys because I can just say, 'Look at the Hall of Famer who's out here practicing harder than anybody.' "

"That's what makes him so special is that he enjoys the process of being great, not just the top, not winning the Super Bowl. [Travis] enjoys the process of practicing," continued Mahomes. "He enjoys the process on working on little details, and that's what the great ones do."

Although Kelce's schedule is beginning to pick up again with the Chiefs scheduled to play their third preseason game on Thursday, Aug. 22, against the Chicago Bears, he is set to make an appearance on the upcoming Happy Gilmore sequel.

David Eulitt/Getty

Travis Kelce during a preseason game on August 17, 2024

Original film star Adam Sandler confirmed the news on the Tuesday, Aug. 20 episode of The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, calling Kelce a "very nice guy."

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"You guys would love him in real life. What a big, handsome guy. He's a stud and he's so funny," said Sandler, 57.

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