fall funny quotes :: Article Creator7 Funny Fall Quotes For The First Day Of Autumn 2016 So You ... - Bustle
by Chelsey Grasso
Sep. 21, 2016
Eunice Kwok / 500px/500Px Plus/Getty Images
Fall may be beautiful, but it's also pretty darn funny sometimes too. If you don't get what I'm talking about, then these funny fall quotes should help to put things into perspective for you. Really, you can make a joke out of everything, and the fall is not a season to be excluded from that mix. As it turns out, it's really not that hard to take a stab at the season that breeds piles of rotting leaves and unreliable weather. And with the first day of autumn upon us, these are more fitting than ever.
There's no denying the breathtaking aesthetic of the autumn season, but beneath all those fallen leaves and after all those mugs of warm apple cider lies some pretty fertile ground for some serious teasing. Not everybody loves the fall (I know, it's pure insanity), and these hilarious quotes demonstrate exactly that.
There's no reason to get cynical about the oncoming change of seasons from summer to fall, but you can get a little silly about it. Take a nice, leisurely stroll through these fall quotes to start the season off with an ache in your belly and a smile on your face. There is really no better way to begin a season, anyway. Now pick up your pumpkin spice latte and hold it up... Cheers!
1. "Why is summer mist romantic and autumn mist just sad?" — Dodie Smith 2. "No shade, no shine, no butterflies, no bees, no fruits, no flowers, no leaves, no birds — November!" — Thomas Hood 3. "Falling leaves hide the path so quietly." — John Bailey 4. "It's like going back to school. You know, autumn! Time for 'Harry Potter'." — Robbie Coltrane 5. "When everything looks like a magical oil painting, you know you are in autumn!" — Mehmet Murat ildan 6. "Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees." — David Letterman 7. "Fall has always been my favorite season. The time when everything bursts with its last beauty, as if nature had been saving up all year for the grand finale." — Lauren DeStefano
Images: Eunice Kwok / 500px/500Px Plus/Getty Images; Giphy (3)
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10 Funny Fall Quotes To Get You Ready For Autumn - Bustle
by Chelsey Grasso
Sep. 20, 2015
Yuga Kurita/Moment/Getty Images
There are very few people who aren't "into" fall, but if you're one of them, you may be pretty sick of hearing about the glorious foliage and crisp autumn air by this time of the year. I'll be honest, it is pretty darn hard to talk smack on what I think is clearly the best season of the year, but that doesn't mean you can't still have a good laugh at its expense. Rounded up below are 10 funny fall quotes that take a stab at the much beloved season. That's right, haters, you have come to the right place — though if I'm being honest, these quotes are fairly lighthearted in their manner and not meant to be read maliciously... Just with a chuckle. Still, something's better than nothing, right?
From a hilarious one liner from David Letterman to a rather dated poetic clause from William Allingham, there's something in here that will make just about every cynic (and even fall-lover) have a good laugh. There are endless amounts of jokes regarding everything pumpkin spice and ~sweater weather~, but I like to think that these quotes have a little more class to them, whether they are being silly, odd, or just plain bitter.
1. "Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees." — David Letterman 2. "No shade, no shine, no butterflies, no bees, no fruits, no flowers, no leaves, no birds — November!" — Thomas Hood 3. "Fall has always been my favorite season. The time when everything bursts with its last beauty, as if nature had been saving up all year for the grand finale." — Lauren DeStefano 4. "Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower." — Albert Camus 5. "The Autumn is old; The sere leaves are flying; He hath gather'd up gold, And now he is dying… Old age, begin sighing!" — Thomas Hood 6. "It's like going back to school. You know, autumn! Time for 'Harry Potter'." — Robbie Coltrane 7. "Autumn's the mellow time." — William Allingham 8. "Why is summer mist romantic and autumn mist just sad?" — Dodie Smith 9. "Autumn wins you best by this, its mute appeal to sympathy for its decay." — Robert Browning 10. "Love the trees until their leaves fall off, then encourage them to try again next year." — Chad Sugg
Images: Yuga Kurita/Moment/Getty Images; Giphy (4)
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100 Fall Jokes That Are Funny Beyond Be-Leaf
100 Fall Jokes That Are Hilarious Beyond Be-LeafFunny Autumn Jokes
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Ready to carve out some fun this fall? Lean into seasonal humor with these hilarious fall jokes.
The best fall jokes
What happens when the horses refuse to pull the wagon in the pumpkin patch?It turns into a neigh ride. What do you call a guy wearing a hockey mask at the grocery store?Freddy Kroger. Why did the man bungee jump on the first day of autumn?Because he loved the fall. What do you call someone who imitates your fall centerpiece?A cornucopier. What did the jack-o'-lantern do when pulled over by the police?Spilled its guts. Who won the skeleton costume contest?No body. What do you call a small pepper in the fall?A little chili. What is a Ghostbuster's job?Spook keeper. What's the best book to read in autumn?Gourd of the Flies. What did autumn say to summer?I'll fall-ow you anywhere. How do you repair a broken jack-o'-lantern?Use a pumpkin patch. Why don't fir trees ever get the blues?They're evergreen. What do you call the smallest apple on earth?An apple-teenie. What movie best describes Thanksgiving morning?The Hunger Games. Puns and one-liner jokes for fall
My favorite fall color is plaid. She was the crab apple of his eye. One bad apple can spoil the whole brunch. My favorite kind of pie is whatever kind I'm eating. It's called fall because you fall asleep when it gets dark at 6 p.M. You know it's fall when the mosquitoes are wearing flannel shirts. Let's give 'em pumpkin to talk about. You're the pick of the pumpkin patch. Carve out some fun this fall. Fall jokes for kids
How do you get rid of ghouls?Ghost them. What do you call a bovine who chases birds?A scare-cow. What was the Pilgrims' favorite kind of music?Plymouth Rock. What is the best fall fairy tale?Pumpelstiltskin. What did the ghost say on the first day of class?"I love going back to ghoul." What is a jack-o'-lantern's favorite book?Are You There, Gourd? It's Me, Margaret. What do you call a bear in the autumn rain?A drizzly bear. What's a ghost's favorite website?BooTube. What was the poltergeist's favorite song?"You Are So Boo-tiful." What did the pirate do when he found the long-lost treasure under the oak tree?He gasped in disbeleaf. Why did the tree giggle?It heard acorn-y joke. Why couldn't the farmer stop laughing?It was time for ha-ha-harvest. Autumn jokes adults will appreciate
Fall makes me want to stay home curled up with a good cook. Fall is when my mind is in the gutter, along with all the leaves. You know you're an adult when what scares you most about back-to-school season are the credit card bills. There's a new site that matches you with your perfect pumpkin. It's called Patch.Com. I love all the fall beverages: spiced cider, hot cocoa and Theraflu. I'm done working on my bikini body. I've decided to focus on my sweater-weather physique instead. Corn is like a teenager: Both have ears, but neither listen. My new fall sweater is so fluffy, a farmer just tried to shear me. You know it's fall when you need a hat and scarf in the shade and shorts and sandals in the sun. Why is it OK for squirrels to bury nuts in the yard, but when I do it, people call me crazy? Fall is the season when you can throw all your leftovers in a pot, add some water and call it "soup." I smell good today. I'm wearing Old Pumpkin Spice deodorant. Scientists say trees communicate with one another by emitting chemicals and electrical signals. Much like teenagers. The pumpkin has been sitting on the patio for so long that it's starting to look like a patient on the TV show Botched. Pumpkin jokes
What do you call a pumpkin in a suitcase?A pack-o'-lantern. What do you get when you cut a rectangular pumpkin pie in half?Pie R-squared. What is a gourd farmer's favorite sport?Squash. Where do pumpkins hold meetings?In the gourd room. How was the month-old jack-o'-lantern like a prehistoric human?He was caved in. Why did the jack-o'-lantern jump off the bridge?She wanted to try rolling on the river. Why did the pumpkin leave home?He thought it was time to cut the gourd. What is a pumpkin's favorite game show?Passgourd. What was the jack-o'-lantern doing at the gym?Pumpkin iron. What do you call a pumpkin that whines a lot?A grumpkin. Apple jokes
Why did the apple roll down the hill?It was sauced. What did the apple say to the caramel sauce?Are you sweet on me? Why did the apple join a gym?To work on its core. What did the Granny Smith apple say as she was being diced up for a pie?"Honey, stand up straight while you chop! And fix your hair." How can you tell if an apple is a McIntosh?Its peel is plaid. What did the Yellow Delicious apple say to the Red Delicious apple?"Why are you blushing?" Why did the apple pie cry?Its peelings were hurt. Tree jokes
What did one tree say to another when they were competing over who had the prettiest leaves?"Birch, please!" Why do trees hate going back to school?Because they get stumped on tests. Why did the maple leaf stay green all fall?It was afraid of change. Why did the tree turn down the wedding proposal?Because it already had enough rings. What was the acorn's favorite old TV show?Leaf It to Beaver. Why did the tree go back to college?It wanted to branch out. What's a tree's favorite subject in school?Geome-tree. What kind of tree is filled with longing?A pine tree. Why did the tree wait so long to lose its leaves?It was a procras-tree-nator. What's a tree's favorite song in autumn?"Don't Stop Be-Leafin'." What is a redwood's favorite NFL team?The Giants. Fall dad jokes
What kind of dog protects a pumpkin patch?A gourd dog. Why do birds fly south in the fall?Airline tickets are cheaper than in the spring. What do you call an ear of corn wearing a bow tie?Dandy corn. What do teenagers and fall weather have in common?They're unpredictable and often give you the cold shoulder. What should you do when your car slides on wet fall leaves?Pump-kin the brakes. Why did the scarecrow skip the horror movie?He didn't have the guts to go. How did the ghost haunt three houses at the same time?She used Boo-tooth. Why did the man avoid carved pumpkins?He didn't know Jack. What happened to the guy who swallowed a corn cob?He had to have a corn-oscopy. What month do fires hate?No-ember. Fall knock-knock jokes
Knock, knock.Who's there?Gull.Gull who?Gull-loshes would be a good idea in this rain. Knock, knock.Who's there?Butternut.Butternut who?Butternut go outside. It's chilly. Knock, knock.Who's there?Venice.Venice who?Venice it going to stop raining? Knock, knock.Who's there?Fall.Fall who?Follow me. We're going to look at the fall leaves. Family-friendly fall jokes
Every year, my family walks a corn maze. And every year, we get lost. This year, we're doing a popcorn maze instead. The best thing to plant in the fall is your butt in a comfy chair in front of the fire. My favorite fall game is How Long Can We Go Before Turning on the Heat for the First Time? While my family is leaf-peeping, I'll be Kansas City Chiefs-peeping. I love fall because no matter what your kids wear, you can call it a costume. Some people bob for apples at Halloween parties. My family bobs for donuts. Not raking leaves is better for the environment and your back. Plus, it gives the snakes somewhere to go instead of your tool shed. Want more autumn laughs? If you loved these fall jokes, you're going to cackle at these hysterical fall memes.
Why trust us
Reader's Digest has been telling jokes for more than 100 years, curated and reviewed over the past 20 years by Senior Features Editor Andy Simmons, a humor editor formerly of National Lampoon and the author of Now That's Funny. We've earned prestigious ASME awards for our humor—including comical quips, pranks, puns, cartoons, one-liners, knock-knock jokes, riddles, memes, tweets and stories in laugh-out-loud magazine columns such as "Life in These United States," "All in a Day's Work," "Laughter, the Best Medicine" and "Humor in Uniform," as well as online collections such as short jokes, dad jokes and bad jokes so bad, they're great. You can find a century of humor in our 2022 compendium, Reader's Digest: Laughter, the Best Medicine. For this piece on the best fall jokes, Leigh Anne Jasheway tapped her experience as a comedy writer and stand-up comedian. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.
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